Stop Taking Back the Burden and Give it Away

Have you ever done something you wish you hadn’t? Did you feel condemned or remorseful? Did the thoughts of it tumble around in your head repeatedly? Thoughts of condemnation and remorse can weigh you down. Here’s a way I found to lighten the load.

When I was in college, I enjoyed having fun and partying on the weekends. After I learned more about Jesus and started growing in my faith, I felt remorse over some of the decisions that I had previously made. I was trying to give it to Jesus but continued to be reminded of it. People kept telling me to, “Let it go. Lay it down. Don’t keep picking that burden up again.”

I tend to imagine things to help me better understand or process things. When I have a burden and am trying to heal, I like to picture myself packaging up all that hurt and shame and handing it to Jesus as a present. In the past I’ve heard, “Once you give it to Jesus, don’t take it back. He has forgotten it and so should you. If you keep asking for forgiveness, you keep taking your burden back.”

As I said before, I would struggle with reminders of the past or thoughts of the person that I had forgiven. I’d beat myself up over the fact that since I am thinking about it again, I either didn’t truly forgive, or I’m taking my burden back. This would make me feel more bound because I didn’t mean to take the burden back. I was trying to give it to God and leave it with Him.

One day, Jesus gave me an image that made it all make a bit more sense.

Have you ever been cleaning out a messy room in your house? Maybe a basement? Did you find something that you wanted to give away that had many pieces?

I have. Many times. I thought I had all the pieces collected, and put them all in a box together. I gave the item away. 

One time I had packed up a bottle drying rack. I carefully made sure I had all the pieces in a box and gave it to Goodwill. A few days later, I came across the center pole to that item. (I knew it was originally in the box, so one of my kids must’ve grabbed it out of the box and played swords with it.) I was so disappointed to have unknowingly given trash to Goodwill, but ended up throwing the piece away.

Another time, we had given a bunch of Transformer toys to a friend. As we found little pieces that went with the characters or the truck, we would package them up and give them to the boys the next time we saw them.

When I found more pieces laying around my house, I didn’t go to Goodwill and ask for the partial rack back so I could give them the full one or go to my friend and ask for the Transformers we gave them so we could add to it and give the whole gift to them again. I simply found stragglers and gave them away as they showed up.

Jesus showed me that a similar thing happens when we give our burdens to Him. We give Him all that we can at the time. Unfortunately, if it’s a big burden, we are going to have reminders and thoughts about that burden. They may be tied to unrelated memories or they may be random thoughts when things are quiet. The enemy is good at trying to torment us with our shame from our past. 

As these thoughts come up, just gather them as they come and hand them off to Jesus. “Excuse me, Jesus. Remember that burden that I gave you? I just found a few more pieces. Would you take them from me, as well?” 

There’s no reason to feel guilty or condemn ourselves for “picking the burden back up.” (The enemy works so well through condemnation). Take the stragglers for what they are, and continue to hand them off until you don’t run across any more pieces of that burden any longer.

Jesus loves you and wants you to be free. Not bound up by burdens and guilt and condemnation. 

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

-Matthew 11:28-29

How about you? Have you been trying to get rid of a burden that you are told you keep “picking back up”? Does this give you a different perspective on how to view that past experience?